Birds of a Feather actress Pauline Quirke has been friends with Loose Women star, and former actress, Linda Robson for more than 50 years, but the latter has now opened up on how Pauline is now struggling to recognise her loved ones.
With a heavy heart, Linda recently told Express.co.uk: “I have noticed a real difference with her; she doesn’t remember her grandchildren, so she’s not going to remember who I am even though we’ve been friends 56 years. It really is sad.”
Pauline, 65, and her family are not alone with their struggles following her dementia diagnosis, which Jess knows about all too well. Jess, 27, from the East Midlands, is using TikTok to share the impact of dementia in hopes of providing solace to others facing similar situations.
Jess, an admin worker who prefers not to reveal her last name, has watched her 92-year-old grandmother, affectionately known as Jean, deteriorate since her diagnosis of vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s disease in 2017.
Initially presenting with forgetfulness and balance issues, Jean’s condition has progressed to the point where she is now bedridden in a care home, unable to perform basic tasks such as eating, drinking, or dressing herself. The most devastating moment for Jess came last year when Jean no longer recognised her, completely forgetting Jess’ existence — a moment Jess describes as “heartbreaking”.
To reach out to those who might be feeling the same pain, Jess uploaded a video on TikTok capturing the precious moments they once shared. Her posts have since touched millions.
Speaking to PA Real Life, Jess expressed the sorrow of seeing her nan’s memory fade: “She just doesn’t know who I am anymore, she doesn’t recognise me, and sometimes she’s living in such a young age that she doesn’t even know she has grandchildren.”
She mourns the loss of the person her grandmother once was: “She’s literally forgotten everything about her whole life that she built, she’s just a shell of herself.”
Despite the ravages of the disease, Jess notes that Jean’s innate warmth remains intact: “But anyone who steps into the room with my nan, no matter where she is in her dementia journey, they’ve always come across the warmth that she has about her.”
Jess fondly remembers her grandmother’s generous spirit: “She’s got such a heart of gold and she would do anything for anyone.”
Jess shared that Jean, a Chesterfield native, spent her working years at the Trebor factory, where she wrapped mints and crafted jar labels. Jean tied the knot with her husband Arthur in 1951, and their diamond anniversary (60 years) in 2011 was marked by a letter from the late Queen Elizabeth II.
Tragically, Arthur succumbed to cancer the following year. Jess spoke of the “close bond” she shares with her grandmother, who played a pivotal role in her upbringing, teaching her life’s basics and cheering her on at every dance show.
Reminiscing about a cherished memory, Jess said: “I have tomato ketchup with almost every meal and she’d make so much fun of me that she’d buy the biggest bottle she could find.”
Jess would often spend her days with Jean, engaging in lengthy discussions about the world, even opting to visit her instead of hanging out with friends. However, in 2017, Jean was diagnosed with vascular dementia — a common form of dementia caused by reduced blood flow to the brain — and Alzheimer’s disease.
The Alzheimer’s Society, a charity organisation, states that vascular dementia is the second most prevalent type of dementia after Alzheimer’s disease, with symptoms varying from person to person. Jess’ family experienced a sense of relief upon receiving the diagnosis as it provided some answers, but they were uncertain about what lay ahead.
Addressing the early warning signs, she said: “She was losing herself more and more every day, forgetting things and her routine and the layout of her home. It was such a strange thing for us all to experience, but she kept telling us at the beginning, ‘It feels like my brain’s muddled up, it’s not working today’.”
Jean’s symptoms began with forgetfulness and memory loss, eventually leading to mobility issues. She now resides in a care home where she receives round-the-clock support, with Jess praising the staff as “incredible”.
Jean is currently bedridden and on an “end of life pathway”, but Jess continues to visit regularly, striving to keep her “brain busy”.
As time has passed, Jess said she and her family have “faced any challenges with open arms”, allowing Jean and her diagnoses to “lead the way”. However, Jess recounted one “heartbreaking” incident last year when Jean forgot her name and who she was within 24 hours of a visit.
“It just broke my heart and I thought, ‘How could you forget 27 years of the life that we spent together? ’ It was just all gone,” Jess expressed.
From that point, Jess decided to compile a video of her cherished memories and share it on her TikTok account @little_jessx. The clips, featuring visits to her nan, singing to her, and casual chats, have since earned Jess over 450,000 followers, with one video racking up an impressive 23.8 million views.
In this viral video, Jess shares heart-wrenching moments of Jean struggling to recognise her, a reality that Jess admits “hits like a tonne of bricks every single time”.
“I honestly didn’t expect the first video to resonate with people the way that it did, and so many people connected with it in such a different way,” she confessed.
She was struck by how her video touched those on their own dementia journey, as well as those unfamiliar with the condition, prompting her to continue sharing these poignant moments. Since then, Jess has found TikTok to be a “safe space” for sharing experiences of dementia, and she’s discovered a resilience she never knew she possessed.
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